I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
its not stalking. its research.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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