I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I have surprise drugs for everyone
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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