You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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