Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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