TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
