Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
