hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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