New low: just hacked my moms facebook
We named our party play list daddy issues
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
