i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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