I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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