North Korea, Best Korea!
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
