You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
