I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
