my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize