i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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