Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
