those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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