I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
