I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize