Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Semen is not good for contacts.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
