no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Randomize
