Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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