my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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