Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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