i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
