You're completely useless in the revolution.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
