I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Randomize
