All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
