im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
