somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
