wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
