I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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