my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
