my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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