But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
