I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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