Define "chronic" masturbator.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize