i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
