if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
