that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize