marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
