it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
