Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
