The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
