Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
