U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
