MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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