Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
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