I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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