do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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