Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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